my dear mum

I have been away from this space for a while - I don't have much to say right now. 
On the first morning of our holiday I was called and told my dear mum was in ICU with heart failure.
This was totally unexpected.
Her five daughters all flew to be with her. I made it and spent the last 4 precious hours with her. 
She died that afternoon. 

We are back home now and the girls and I are learning to weave her loss and her life into our days.
We are deeply grateful for the freedom that our lifestyle affords us; to deeply honour this time, to feel the fullness of grief and to embrace life with renewed tenderness.

I will return to post here as I can.

Parts of a blessing resonating with me right now from "Bless The Space Between Us" by John O'Donohue.

For Grief

When you lose someone you love,
Your life becomes strange,
The ground beneath you gets fragile,
Your thoughts make your eyes unsure;
and some dead echo drags your voice down
Where words have no confidence.

Your heart has grown heavy with loss;
And though this loss has wounded others too,
No one knows what has been taken from you
When the silence of absence deepens.

There are days when you wake up happy;
Again in the fullness of life,
Until the moment breaks 
And you are thrown back
On the black tide of loss.

Gradually, you will learn acquantance 
With the invisible form of your departed;
And when the work of grief is done,
The wound of loss will heal
And you will have learned 
To wean your eyes
From the gap in the air
And be able to enter the hearth
In your (heart) where your loved one
Has awaited your return
All the time.


  1. love love love u and love the poem.

  2. Thinking of you all, especially your mum.... and if your sisters are anything like you Jacinda, then your mum has given the world five wonderful people for us all to enjoy. Much love to you and yours, hold each other tight. Katie xxx

  3. Thanks for a your thoughts - it is comforting to feel love of friends right now. Katie, email me (on the sidebar) so I can be in contact:)

  4. FOund you again on my bookmarks...
    so sorry to hear the news.
    sending a hug, friend.

  5. so sorry to hear about your mother — sending warm thoughts xoxo

  6. Our unschooling lifestyle really helped us through the grieving process earlier this year when my mother passed away. The freedom to take our time and the ease in which my children took control of how they wanted to do the funeral. As we have more and more choice in the beginnigs of life (homebirth etc) its was a time like this that helped us remember the choices we have at the end of our life.
    Special blessings to your family as you walk this path. We have experienced the most joyful moments in the deepest times of grief.

  7. Daily I feel grateful for the time and space to say goodbye in the most whole and real way i know. Thanks for the blessings.